If you’re currently with someone, be honest with yourself and see if you really feel good about your relationship or if you are waiting for something else deep inside.
You should feel comfortable expressing your thoughts and feelings openly to this person without fearing their judgment or ridicule. If you feel pressure to be someone else or act a certain way to get their attention, this could be a bad sign. Make sure that you are ready for a committed relationship. Evaluate where you are at this stage of life. Are you ready to get married now? In the next few years? Or are there things you want to accomplish before getting married? Do you know what you want well enough to get married yet?
Look for a man who will support you and encourage you to pursue your desires and dreams.
If you’re waiting years for your boyfriend to come around, have a serious discussion and let him know what you want. Do not be afraid to ask him this question, and do not put off asking because you are afraid of his answer. This is an important question. If you are serious about getting married someday, you should know if your significant other is on the same page or not.
Whether you both love camping or both already have children, make sure there’s at least one thing you can bond over with your potential spouse. Perhaps similar beliefs unite you or you both value family.
Think about how you tend to approach conflict and find a man who has a similar or complementary approach. Even if his style is different than yours, you both should work well together to resolve conflict. Resolving conflicts can help you understand each other better and not hold resentment toward each other.
Find common ground in your beliefs or values. Learn to accept their religion and learn about it. [5] X Research source
Consider your values around keeping separate bank accounts or using a joint bank account. Have a plan for tackling debt, creating savings, and dividing money.
If you don’t have a great relationship with your own family and want to feel connected to your future husband’s family, look for a man who lives near his family and has a great relationship with his parents and siblings.
Look for a man you can openly talk to and who makes you feel understood. For example, people in a healthy emotional relationship will turn toward one another during times of hardship and in times of celebration.
If he has lots of conflicts in his relationships or has cut off friends or family members, ask about what led to these actions and why they have happened repeatedly.
If you’re looking for the right man, see if he can be flexible with changes and turn toward you and not away from you. Notice how he responds to changes in his life and ask yourself how he would do in the long-term.
Take responsibility for your own feelings without blaming your partner, and notice if he does this, too. If you feel frustrated, speak up or do something to change things on your own initiative.
Accept that there will be lots of things you disagree on. Be ready to accept him as he is without feeling the need to change him. Accept that you have flaws, too. Be ready for them to come to light.
Don’t expect things to get better. For example, if the man is violent or has an addiction, don’t expect him to change just because you might get married. Be cautious.
